I love the “Sharknado” movies. A lot. They’re not good films by any stretch of the imagination, but they’re just so laughably bad I can’t help but love them. They began airing on the Syfy channel in 2013, starring Ian Ziering as the protagonist Fin and Tara Reid as April, a husband and wife duo who always seem to get caught in the middle of sharknados. 

For those unfamiliar with what a sharknado actually is, it’s a tornado filled with sharks. As the movies go on, the characters also fight off sharkicanes (shark hurricanes, obviously), space sharks and time-traveling sharknados. I know there’s just so many of you dying to watch these cinematic masterpieces, so I’ve gone ahead and ranked them from worst to best to give you the best guide for which films in the series to watch and which ones you’re better off avoiding.

Absolute Worst- “The Last Sharknado: It’s About Time”

For being the last movie in the series, you think they would have perfected the “Sharknado” formula, balancing that line between comedy and taking the plot seriously, but they really missed the mark with this one. The concept of a sharknado is outrageous enough, but they pushed that concept too far in this movie, using time travel to try and stop every sharknado ever from happening. The characters travel to Camelot, the Revolutionary War and the Wild West (but I’ll admit, watching the Founding Fathers go up against a sharknado was pretty funny) and it’s so absurd that it almost takes you out of the movie. The actors also seem to take themselves a little too seriously, so the overly crazy premise and too serious actors just don’t mesh well. The comedy really didn’t hit in this movie either, so when I watched this I found myself just waiting for it to be over. 2/10

Not as Bad, But Still Pretty Bad- “Sharknado 5: Global Swarming”

Sadly, this movie suffers from many of my gripes from the sixth movie, where the actors take themselves too seriously and the concept becomes too crazy for me to suspend my disbelief. I did like the opening intro where Fin steals an ancient sharknado artifact that basically mirrors Indiana Jones stealing the artifact “Raiders of the Lost Ark” style, and the scene where April sacrifices herself to stop the sharknado/tsunami combo is just so hilarious. The writers knew this scene was silly and the actors take themselves just seriously enough, only for the scene to gut punch you and April’s head just kind of falls flatly in front of Fin. I know it sounds gruesome (the “Sharknado” movies kind of are), but it’s just so stupid you can’t help but laugh. These scenes don’t make up for the rest of the movie’s overly absurd plot, as the gang fights off a Sharkzilla and also the ancient Egyptian gods are involved. 3.5/10

Not too Bad- “Sharknado”

Didn’t expect to see the first one so far down on the list did you? This movie takes itself too seriously and the only thing that saves it is that the stakes aren’t too high. There’s just the single sharknado, no time-traveling or other strange shenanigans, so the actors being so grounded is somewhat excusable. There really isn’t too much comedy in this movie, but because it is the first film in the series, the absurdity of the situation takes the edge off the seriousness and makes it a fun watch the first time around. 5/10

Right in the Middle- “Sharknado: The 4th Awakens”

Here is where the series starts to move into “too absurd” territory, but the premise and comedy more than make up for it. The actors are in their element, fighting off lavanadoes, cownadoes and a radioactive sharknado. What’s not to love? Plus, with this movie piggybacking off the hype surrounding “Star Wars: The Force Awakens” it adds an extra level of comedy with nerdy little references scattered across the film. And the reveal of April being a crazy cyborg lady is just hilarious. 6.5/10

A Fun Experience- “Sharknado 3: Oh Hell No!”

It’s the dumbest thing I’ve ever watched and I’m absolutely in love. The movie follows Fin and April as they try to stop a sharknado ripping across the east coast and it literally begins with a sharknado attacking the White House while Fin is receiving his Presidential Medal of Freedom. As the movie goes on, the duo devise a plan to launch the sharknado into space and it literally ends with April giving birth to her son from inside a shark that is falling from outer space. She then uses her chainsaw hand to cut her way out of the dead shark and give Fin their newborn son (named Gil). It’s so dumb and I love it so much, everyone needs to watch this movie at least once. 8/10

Cinematic Gold- “Sharknado 2: The Second One”

This is the greatest “Sharknado” movie you will ever watch. This film opens with Fin (who has no pilot training) landing an airplane in the middle of a sharknado. It’s obviously silly, but the actors are taking themselves just seriously enough and the comedy is written so that you’re laughing the entire time. Watching the Statue of Liberty’s head fall off and terrorize the people of New York and Fin using sharks as stepping stones to reach his friends is just great. At the end Fin proposes to April by pulling a severed arm with a wedding ring on it out of a dead shark. It’s so over the top and silly that you can’t help but love it. 10/10

Categories: Arts & Entertainment